7/23/97
What a boisterous little romp!
My experience has simultaneously been one of universe-searching and soul-searching.
The universe part:
The world of Los Alamos... the first really fascinating trip we took (there are many) was to the cosmologist Rocky Kolb, whose lecture on primordial soup left everyone with a dropped jaw. His humor was the hot sauce on top; perpendicular universes and Campbell's Primordial Soup had never come in any of my readings. Tuesday' hike into the surrounding mesas, was, for me, seeing the outdoors' alter-ego, being used to the Ohio landscape, which is more flat than a Euclidean plane and which is filled with deciduous trees. The journey into the ALEXIS control station was probably the best treat we've had (aside to the fact of all-expense paid); it was quite amazing to see the initial work and how later, the satellite's mission was (is) fulfilled through an eight member team in a closet-size room. Very interesting was Sterling Colgate's lecture on the sodium experiment intended to simulate the physics of accretion disks in quasars and blazars (edge-on quasars). Interesting because not only was in on an area in which I am interested, but it was a glimpse into what I don't know and hopefully will soon. Also, a glimpse into the sort of way science works socially, for some Colgate's ideas were debated after the lecture.
And of course comes the inside world of the trip, perhaps more important. I've really enjoyed the astronomy lectures given by Galen, Michelle, and Heather. The weather has really been a snafu, for to date I only saw the night sky once, and it was half of it for a half-hour at five in the morning. It has backed up all our work, for we had to test the telescope on street lamps and lights down the hall as opposed to the rest of the universe. Another chunk of work was covering the lights in the hall so the test images could be made in the dark. But, I have a little faith in probability and trust we'll get to do at least a minimal amount of substantial work with the sky. And I've been learning to the tenth power... photometry is something about which I was completely illiterate four days ago. And the people on our team are fantastic; there' not one with whom I don't get along, and our continual comic relief is a necessity in warding off the demons of bad-luck weather.
My soul-searching part has been one of experiencing the scientific community from the inside, and thinking about my interest-path. Seeing things like debates between Colgate and others shows how subjective science is. As Galen said, the scientific method does not exist! Hah! As I knew before from fact and now from experience, astronomy can be a very frustrating endeavor. And I've been thinking about which little niches within physics are my own, as everyone else has, I know. It's great to see a stereotype shattered, for some of the astrophysicists I've met have been completely different on the personality-spectrum than others. Everyone on the team, though, is quite compatible. So here I write with the trip a quarter of the way over, and it's as if I've only seen the optical part of this infinite spectrum.
7/27/97
(7/24)
This day proved to have a mix of leisurely learning and difficult work. The geologic tour's first leg was a bit redundant, but as soon as we arrived back at Soda Dam, it became incredible: seeing a 60,000 year-old dam of travertine next to a two million year-old mountain and entering a looming Anasazi cave. Oh, and in between, a flat tire decided to POP in. The Milagro site was incredible- it reads, through a network of underwater photo multipliers, one megabyte of information per second! After, we walked to a heliport with a fantastic view of the Jemez; if listening, one hears a complete silence on the hill, strange for being in between two mountains. Next came the gorgeous Fenton hill Lake, where we feasted on soggy catered dinners. Any minor hardship was compensated for a while later at the data collection back at Milagro. Guthrie and I worked on the Meade telescope, and even though we got about five pictures for about five hours of work, we got much more well acquainted with the equipment. Poor Ed had to spend the time solely focusing the LDRD telescope But it was the most fun evening yet, because throughout we either sang Beatles songs with Galen or had profound discussions on religion. Somehow one of those two always tends to happen under the stars.
(7/25)
In the start of what we call a day (ours end at 3:00 AM), we met Carrie Avery from the Durfee foundation, with whom we a scrumptious Mexican dinner while talking about the foundation and various universities. After came a very productive afternoon, in which we discussed the previous night and came up with a skeleton plan of how to organize the upcoming nights' research. I got a feel for all the uncertainties and complex factors which a scientist must consider. The Shakespeare experience that night in Santa Fe was quite an puckish little romp. Arriving, we consumed some food which was quite delicious but quasar-high expensive. The setting was, in my opinion, perfect for Shakespeare- a Renaissance feel (adobe buildings, but still fitting), minstrels, and all under a New Mexico sunset. Two things about the play, A Winter's Tale, really impressed me: the psychological torment of Leontes and the lifelike memory of his son's death (hence, a winter's tale). That evening came a laundry party since everyone had to wash clothes, but I soon crashed, for unless one makes a conscious effort the days here don't end.
(7/26)
After a bunch of logistical cheese, an unsuccessful attempt to assemble a team brunch at Avery Pond (Pond), and what turned out to be a substantial gas station lunch, we headed off to Tsankawi and took one of the best hikes I've ever been on- Diane, our guide, told us fascination tales of her studies of the Anasazi and their astronomical genius. The trail itself was in a rut carved into the rocks through centuries of use, and they eventually led us to the ruins of a pueblo where we examined literally hundreds of chips of pained Anasazi pottery. Obsidian and shirt, too. The rock carvings possessed the continuing motif of concentric circles (which she thinks corresponds to the positions of shadows at summer and winter solstice). One she discovered at another location had a five-tail comet; amazingly, the Chinese recorded a five-tail comet at around the same time. Her speculations and tales of the culture were incredible. The New Mexico Anasazi tribes possessed moieties, or the modern day equivalent of political parties. Each took a different geographical region (north or south) at a respective time of the year. I still can't figure out why they lived on mesas; protection is one possibility, but Diane said each clan rarely contacted others. What is known is that their crops were planted in the valleys in between, which at the time contained a higher flow of water. They ate a native grass that has far more protein than corn and that is still in abundance today. They even bred corn-like plants to better ones over centuries. In fact, when the Anaszis first arrived (I'm not sure when) the average temperature was 45 degrees Fahrenheit, huge lakes covered the region, and predators reminiscent of the ice age stalked the land. They apparently lived a nomadic existence first, but later constructed pueblos. Even then, though, most of their lives were lived outside. I found some of her speculations a bit fantastic- like that the raised arms on petroglyphs symbolize a shamanistic, trance-inducing culture. As most of American history seems to go, a big part of the environment and culture (grass by sheep grazing) was destroyed by the Spanish. Since the weather clouded over the sky, our trip to an amateur astronomers' convention was canceled. We had an excellent Chinese dinner, and with Ed's help I could almost use chopsticks. We sort of puttered around since nature was, at that point, against us, so we went to see Contact which for me was still great the second time, but less emotional. Ellie pulled a maneuver of mine as she kissed the screen in joy of finding the extraterrestrial signal (in my case, taking an astrophotograph). Getting back, we had another laundry party where everyone collectively improved my washing capabilities (Very high). Snooze.
7/27/97
Spent the afternoon with some [random] work, and we soon made our way over to Galen's office at LANF, where we soon came up with a skeleton logistical plan for observing, expanding on Friday's- We're splitting into 2 teams, one for each telescope, and having rotating tasks within that group on each night. I am semi-in-charge of the Meade telescope, same for Ed with the LDRD, and Lauren and Rumman are overseers who make of lists of objects to observe. It's going to be difficult to do a double-site night, for Pajarito Peak is very inaccessible. We had a second meeting that evening, following dinner at Red lobster in Santa Fe where I practically had a heart attack laughing.
7/28/97
Today consisted of a struggle to educate people about bear dangers, which ended up going rather well. Except for the fact that we couldn't use it, for the night was completely clouded out.
7/29/97
We took an interesting trip to Santa Fe. We ate at the really delicious Plaza Cafe, then ran off to the Georgia O'Keefe museum, which, for the twenty minutes we were there, was a gorgeous display of hundreds of her originals. Her floating "Ladder to the Moon" was quite relevant to the trip, and I liked her flowing balance of colors much. After, we toured the Loretto Chapel and saw its Miraculous Staircase, which supposedly was and answer to prayer there in the mid nineteenth century. The entire sensation was almost mystical in nature, except when we walked out and found ourselves in a gift shop. After, we walked around to other various gift shops and watched a rather talented all-encompasing rock band on the square.
All else, same old clouds.
7/30/97
Soon after getting up the phone rang, and it was Donna saying, "Galen made a radical change of plans: we're going to the VLA..." Yahoo! (As a note to any reader, I have, I think, literally dreamed of going there.)
Off we wentest. The drive down there was incredible- for an Ohioan, it's an incredible and beautiful sight to see so much nothing, surrounded by mountains. Cathy remarked that it would be an interesting day in multiple ways- one of these turned out to be drive-thru stop at Wendy's after which we all, particularly myself, spilled food on ourselves. On with the show!
I'd have to say that the VLA (Very Large Array of radio telescopes) is now one of my favorite places on the shell of the Earth. The quite friendly PR person there gave us a wonderful tour with an array (ha,ha) of fascinating information: 13 miles of total possible extension, 27 280-foot dishes moving in unison, an atomic clock to coordinate the difference in arrival of the signals, and a resolution of one thousandth of one arc second! The aura around the place for miles is such that it seems a window to infinity. A big piece of me remains beck there, and I wish to return.
The return voyage brought us to a rather yummy steakhouse, and Cathy and I talking to Michelle about everything I can possible imagine about college. What I know quite definitely is that I want to be a generalist.
7/31/97
The day's first leg... Over to Canyon School we went to plan the next day's presentation to the Transient Phenomena interest group, and after a pun-tiful lunch of leftovers with Todd and the Gislers. Soon we returned to a very interesting lecture by Todd on neutrino detectors, and after left for Galen's cookout. It had the feel of a family get-together, but everyone seemed to experience the truthful aura that it would be one of our last shebangs. We goofed around and ate deliciously before watching a Gisler, Cathy, and Nicole jam session on the harp, hammered dulcimer, piano, and guitar.
The third and final Fenton Hill observations went all night, and were consequently quite productive. Since we couldn't (AND HAD ABSOLUTELY NO DESIRE) to use the elephant-like LDRD telescope, we (Cathy, Nicole, and I) took visual observations (i.e. drawings) on Don's Meade telescope while the others used the CCD camera on the other Meade telescope. In between some big chunks of clouds were some extraordinary beautiful glimpses of Saturn, the Ring Nebula, and our longtime friend Jupiter. Our group came up with seventeen drawings throughout the night, a big accomplishment compared to last week's CCD count of five images. 6:15 AM's sunrise was incredible, but I crashed seconds later, for one needs his three hours of sleep.
8/1/97
The presentation to the Transient Phenomena interest group went much better than we all originally expected. The preparation that morning went rather hastily (three hours' sleep!), but no one became heavily stressed since we expected, and it was, an informal affair. Cathy, Ed, Nicole, and I reported on the little but valuable data that we have collected over the two sessions. After, one astrophysicist gave us one of the best lectures I've ever heard: the myths of science. I find myself believing these at times, even given the irrationality some possess: science grows like a tree, the "scientific method" is effective, science moves toward one goal, the greatest scientists are on the "lunatic fringe", and rational arguments change people's beliefs.
The Pajarito Peak trip was an appropriate climax for the trip. The ride down was absolutely incredible; by the time the 4WD Pathfinders were bumping up the hill, we could see everything we had just driven through as if it was from an aircraft; the view went out for what seemed to be at least 75 miles. Getting up to the top, we quickly set up and ate, attempting to beat what we thought was a storm coming straight at us- fortunately, it never hit or even rained, both of which would have spelled a terrible logistical nightmare. We ended up attaining some useful data- overall, it seems to have much better seeing that Fenton Hill, but with the disadvantage of horrible accessibility and Albuquerque's lights. And we made enough noise to keep bears (and some humans) discouraged from roaming about the campsite.
For the group, it was the best night we've had together- taking the observations was quite exciting, and Saturn is quite an awe-invoking sight. During the three hours that it was cloudy, we first sat on top of the car and talked about everything in existence, then the cold forced us to sit inside, where we told stupid jokes and sang songs. I was about to enter hibernation when the clouds cleared, and Rumman, Jim, and I set up the telescope and did some observing, ending with watching the sunrise.
8/2/97
This day was part of the continuous spectrum of the previous (days of three hours' sleep do that). I slept the way home and crashed back here, after which we took the same trip in reverse to see Jemez Pueblo. It was pretty amazing, and a learning experience in different cultures- the people there are quite adamant about no photography, as I learned when a man had to confiscate the film of someone who was taking a picture. The dances were interesting, and the hundreds of people participating move in unison. It is considered impolite to clap. The way back: more sleep.
* * *
So here I write on the last hours of the trip. I still have yet to see how it benefits Los Alamos scientifically, but the relatively little data we gathered will, at the very least, be a start to site characterization. I will be absolutely joyed and proud if an observatory is placed at either Fenton Hill or Pajarito Peak, for those are the ones to which we contributed directly. For me, I ended up experiencing a lot less of the backbreaking or mind-breaking work that I expected. And I think another trip such as this one should have more science opportunities for rain. But I experienced things that I hadn't dreamed of, and I would enjoy working here one day. The friends I've made here are possibly the greatest memory, and I'm already feeling terribly sad to leave them. There's so much more here to do and so many more conversations to have... hopefully they will both happen.